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Choosing
your Maid of Honor and bridesmaids.
Getting Married?
Choose your bridal party with care
and understanding!
A bride's friendships may suffer
if she blunders in choosing her
maid of honor and bridesmaids. But,
by choosing maids wisely, she can
avoid damaging cherished relationships.
A
bride may hurt the feelings of
her friends (or sisters or cousins)
by not choosing them to be part
of her wedding party - but, by
selecting them, she may be saddling
them with a heavy burden.
The friend to whom she offers
the position of maid of honor
might not wish to plan and fund
a bridal shower, with its inherent
cost of time and money.
In addition to planning and funding
the shower (often with help and
funding from the bridesmaids),
the maid of honor is expected
to give a shower gift, a wedding
gift and shell out money for a
gown - a gown that she may not
like or ever wear again!
The maid of honor and the bridesmaids
are also expected to attend the
rehearsal, rehearsal dinner and,
perhaps, other pre-wedding parties.
Other obligations often include
addressing envelopes, attending
shopping expeditions and dress
fittings, and assisting the bride
with any chores needed on the
big day.
Some brides get so caught up in
the excitement of planning one
of the most important days in
their life that they forget that,
to the maid of honor and the bridesmaids,
the wedding is a less significant
day.
A bride should review the costs
and inconveniences her maids would
incur. If someone she plans to
ask to be a maid is unlikely to
have the funds to spare, the bride
should consider offering to help
with the cost of the dress and
the shower. If a friend may need
to fly into town for a shower
or other pre-wedding event, the
bride should consider the logistics
her friend faces in doing so.
After determining her choices
for maids, the bride should ask
each friend, privately, whether
she wishes to take on the duties
involved. The bride should make
it clear that she would understand
should her friend decline.
In addition to considering cost
and time, the bride should choose
friendship over aesthetics. No
one will remember that one of
the bridesmaids was a little taller
or tubbier than the usher with
whom she was paired; however,
a friend will remember that she
was overlooked, and that friendship
will be damaged forever.
Remember that friendships are
for life, while the most elaborate
wedding is over in a matter of
hours.
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