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Start
Conversations as Easily as You
Start a Car
Copyright 2004, Arlen Busenitz
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Starting a car is easy. Put the key in,
turn it, and the car starts. Would it
not be great if starting a conversation was
this easy? It can be--if you know how!
Unfortunately, many people don't know how.
They struggle with starting conversations.
If they do break the silence, the conversation
sputters and dies.
This leads to boring parties, embarrassing silences,
lack of friends and social skills. Not
being able to easily start a conversation hinders
business success and enjoyment in life.
Do you know what I am talking about?
Starting a conversation can be as easy as starting
a car. The reason you can quickly start
a car is because you know the two steps:
Step 1: Put the key in the ignition
Step 2: Turn the key.
These two steps work every time with virtually
any car. So also there is a 2-step method
for starting conversations. It will enable you
to start a conversation anywhere, anytime, with
virtually anyone.
Here is the 2-step method for starting conversation:
Step 1: Break the silence.
Step 2: Ask a good question.
Simple is it not? Don't let the simplicity
of the 2-step method fool you. It works!
I have used the 2-step method with total
strangers, friends, businessman, and even shy
people with great success. Let me explain
more.
Step 1: Break the silence.
A person cannot start a car until they put the
key in the ignition, neither can a conversation
start until the silence is broken. Generally,
a greeting works great to break the silence.
"Hi Tom"
"Good morning"
"Hello."
There is a second way to break the silence and
that is with a comment. This works well
with strangers.
On a plane: "This has been a long delay."
To a clerk: "Looks busy today."
To a friend: "That was a good football
game last night."
Now that the silence is broken, it is time to
get the conversation flowing with the second
step.
Step 2: Ask a good question.
Almost any question will work. In fact
any question is better than dead silence.
However, a good question will get the conversation
moving. Here are a few examples:
"How are you doing today?"
"How was your week?"
"Where are you from?"
"How often do you fly?"
"What do you enjoy about this class?"
You might be thinking, "What if the conversation
does not start after I ask a question?"
This will sometimes happen. When
it does, just remember the car illustration.
Turn the key over again and ask another
question. The conversion will eventually
start.
That's it! Break the silence and ask a
good question. Do this and you will be
able to start a conversation as easily as you
start a car.
